Sunday, October 12, 2014

she laughs.


I'm not really afraid much of heights or bugs or things of that type. I don't necessarily enjoy public speaking per se, but I'm not terrified of it. I used to say that I wasn't really afraid of anything... but that's not true.

I'm scared of the future. I'm scared to grow up. I'm scared of being a failure.

Those fears are different than your typical phobias of external problems. They reveal a trust issue.

**

I had lunch a few weeks ago with one of my close friends from years past. Somehow we got to talking about my upcoming graduation and how it was so scary and rushing up quickly. And suddenly she dropped this wisdom bomb on me. 

"I was reading in my Bible the other day and came across this verse and it stumped me. 
She is clothed in strength and dignity, she laughs without fear of the future. (Proverbs 31:25)
How is it possible that someone can laugh in the face of the future?"

Through the remainder of our conversation, the answer became clear. This woman (the ideal woman. the one we all strive to become.) knows what she faces will be horrible. She knows that what all can go wrong, will more than likely go wrong at one point in time.

But she holds onto a greater hope.

She can be joyous despite what comes because she knows that whatever it is -- be it terrible or wonderful -- it will be a blessing to her. God will grow her through it. 

But the problems she will face? Her God is so much greater than any attack of the devil. And at his futile attempts to break her apart -- she laughs. 




Month of firsts (part 1)

SO.
I haven't been the best at doing something new EVERY single day, but I've done a whole lot of firsts and that's been really exciting.

So here is a short list of what all new things I have done so far this month:

  • got a tattoo (whoa i know.. "I decided that it was about time for the scars on one side of my wrist to have a permanent counter as a reminder of God's constant love -- despite any hurts that are brought to the table. #2timothy17 #twloha")
  • painted with chalkboard paint
  • rode a motorcycle (ahhh, I want one now!!)
  • went to a wedding shower without my mom 
  • ordered a coffee with four shots of expresso (can you say ENERGY)
  • ate a cupcake sandwich
  • saw oreo cows
  • drank a cortado coffee (it was SO strong but really good :) 
  • skyped with my boyfriend's parents
  • took pictures in a hayfield
  • ate a "sweet pea" fry.. or something like that. it was actually really good.
  • made a C on a test (at least I hope it's a C.. ha)
I'm sure there were a few others that I can't remember.. but I'll add them when I remember them. In the meantime, here are a few pictures of my firsts.. mainly with food -- which is boring to some people, but whatever :)